Idiot

$Idiotsyncracies \id•e•ot•seen•cra•seez\ n.: The goofy private acts, rituals and behaviors no one, but no one, ever sees or suspects you do. Gina dances around singing ‘If loving you is wrong, I don't want to be right’ to a heaping bowl of ice cream. (Of course, this can't be considered a true idiotsyncracy unless the ice cream is Rocky Road, in which case there’s an outfit and choreographed steps.) Whether it's the way you ‘practice’ your dates in front of the mirror (‘This dress? I've had it for ages, but thanks, you're sweet.’), the fact that you’ll skip a workout if your hair looks too cute, or the way you sing to your Lean Cuisine (to the tune of Lady Madonna: ‘Chick-en Lasagna/Tender white breast meat/wonder how you manage to stand the he-e-eat’), no one has any clue about the things you do. Good! Keep it that way. Slowly letting a person, over the course of many, many years, into your private world is fine. Springing it on them too early is social suicide, especially with the opposite sex. One nasty breakup and the fact that you slow dance around the apartment with your cat, moisturize with Crisco or consider your teeth a pedicure tool will be e-mail fodder for the rest of your life.$

Ever unleash your inner Tammy? Suffer a fatal Exit Wound? Gone through Manopause? Of course you have. You just didn't realize it - until now. BarCode is an irreverent glossary of dating words that allows both sexes to put a name to their pain. Now you’ll be able to instantly recognize the subtle difference between Cute Crazy and just plain crazy crazy, and know in a flash if the relationship can survive his Pest Friend or her Idiotsyncrasies. More importantly, you’ll become fluent in the art of pillow talk and be able to answer that age-old dating question: what’s that supposed to mean?

Published by Conari Press. An imprint of Red Wheel Weiser.